DVD Bonus Matches
Grizzley Redwood vs. Chasyn Rance – ¾*
Just there to get Franklin’s new gimmick over. Crowd shit on it at first and then ate it up.
Daizee Haze vs. Madison Eagles – ½*
2 minutes. The ROH women’s division is the worst out of the “big 3.”
Rhett Titus vs. Josh Daniels - *1/4
And so concludes the worst bonus matches on ROH PPV history.
PPV
Austin Aries vs. Delirious - **3/4
Really good for 7 minutes. Pretty much a storyline advancer with Jacobs hurting his back before the main event here via murder death kill on Aries, but it was really, really strong.
Sara Del Rey vs. Jessie McKay – DUD
Squash.
Brent Albright & Erick Stevens vs. Adam Pearce & Eddie Edwards – ** 1/4
Again, really good, but really short. 6 minutes in fact. Fairly hot crowd so far as they were even hot for the the usually apathetic-drawing Stevens and Albright.
Chris Hero vs. Jerry Lynn – **3/4
More goodness. This is the first I’ve seen of Lynn in ROH (excluding the match in Houston) and I really forgot how good he is. The first word that comes to mind is professional. Hero lays the beatdown on old man Lynn before Jerry makes a nice comeback. Nothing you haven’t seen a million times, but it’s been used a million times for a reason and Lynn can pull it off better than most of those that have tried, even at 45 years old.
Bryan Danielson vs. Claudio Castagnoli vs. Go Shiozaki (Three Way Elimination Match) – ***1/4
MOTN so far. Claudio’s elimination is hilarious. After he’s gone, he literally just throws students in to each other and chunks them over his shoulder into the 2nd row with ease. The meat of the match is Danielson taking a beating, but he’s one of the best at that so this rules fairly hard.
Jay & Mark Briscoe vs. The Vulture Squad vs. The YRR vs. The Necro Butcher (Scramble Match) - **1/2
Short ans sweet spotfest. Noting to note really.
Nigel McGuinness vs. Roderick Strong (ROH World Title Match) - ***3/4
Wow. Great match as you’d come to expect from Nigel’s epic reign. Just Nigel beating Roderick to a pulp throughout with Strong refusing to fall in a title match again. Nigel’s really mastered the style that he uses. I’m gonna miss him. Strong comes oh so close as per with the guy, but once again Nigel is too strong and murders him with multiple offense for the pinfall. Not as good as Nigel’s defense against Claudio from the last PPV, but not far off.
Jimmy Jacobs & Tyler Black vs. Kevin Steen & El Generico (World Tag Team Title Match) - ****1/2
Jimmy still has an injured back from the table spot earlier. Tyler is still pissed that Jimmy did such a selfish thing. Got a point tbh. Steenerico’s last shot at the belts. Generico plays the perfect face in peril here. You just feel he wants to make the tag more than anything. Generico does finally get the tag once the crowd gets behind him and becomes molten. Then it kicks into high gear. When the “worst” part of the match is El Generico taking a beating, you know the match is sweet. Monster nearfalls that the crowd buys non stop. The Swanton Bomb/Splash nearfall is one of the best in the company’s history. Total speed freak mode then erupts. Tons of emotion from the crowd and all four guys do a great job of playing off of it. Jacobs taking the pinfall makes sense with his injury, and Steenerico take the gold for the first time in ROH. Great stuff. I’d say it’s probably the 2nd best 2 on 2 tag match of the year. Too bad Steenerico’s reign never lived up to the chase.
Overall, one of their weakest PPV efforts at this point totally saved by the final 2 matches. The main event you should totally go out of your way for as it was truly a memorably moment in ROH history.
Friday, April 17, 2009
Thursday, April 9, 2009
Wrestlemania 25 Live Review
Colons vs. M&M - **3/4
Really fun match. Great way to kick off the show. I was surprised to see it on the preshow, but whatever. If you’ve seen one of their matches, you’ve seen this one. Still really good for time given.
MITB - ****
I could go ***3/4 but my blind markiness for Punk pushes this into that territory. Really enjoyed it as the rating shows. Kofi is a freak. He really stood out in the match. There was also a part of me, albeit small, that thought maybe Orton wins the title and HHH kills him. Then Punk cashes in and poetically gets revenge on Orton for taking his title in September. I know, I know.
Apparently, I’m the only one who didn’t mind Kid Rock. I mean I had that damn CD with these songs 10 years ago, so maybe that’s why. Way too long though.
Divas - N/R
Too much shit going on for me to care. I looked in the ring from my seats and saw a sea of blonde hair, so it was tough to pick them apart. Santino was pretty over. I don’t rate battle royales.
Jericho vs. Legends - **1/2
Holy mother. Blew me away. Give Steamboat a contract now. Glad Jericho went over. Speaking of over, Flair very much is. I heard ‘woo’ing all day and he got a great pop when his face showed on screen or when he was in the match.
Matt vs. Jeff - ***1/4
Pretty much what I expected. Fun hardcore garbage match. Loved the finish too, just a sick TOF.
Rey vs. JBL – ¼*
Um, yeah. Thanks for the memories, John. Entertaining segment.
Michaels vs. Taker - *****
All right. First off, I’m pleased to see ratings like this from a ton of people for the match. When it was over and the first “rating” to pass through my mind (I swear it didn't cross my mind until after the 3 way was over. I was like, “Oh yeah, STARZ~! What was I thinking? This is clearly the most important thing about wrestling. I should probably get on that if I want some sweet IWC credibility.”) was *****, I figured I’d have to explain myself. Looks like I’m not alone, but I’ll go ahead and try to anyway even though I’m dead tired as I type this. I remember people saying that everyone was rating this match ***** before it even happened like Flair/Michaels last year. I’m sure in some instances it’s true, but not on my end. I’m a low expectation kind of person. I keep them there and I’m rarely let down (especially when it comes to wrestling, where even if I’m let down by something, I can turn around and find another match or whatever to pick me up).
Anyways, I’m gonna go ahead and cheat with my rating and use an old fashioned cop out. My reasoning? You just…had..to be there. OK, judging by all the five stars I see coming from posters I see that isn’t necessarily true. The whole fucking feel of this moment (not match…moment. From the screenshot that flashed on the big screen before the match took place, to the pop THAT got, to Shawn’s (I’m sure super cheesy to some but not to me) grand entrance to clearly the match itself, everything about this screamed perfect to me. I’ve had a feeling very close to this before, at Mania X-7 when I saw Rock and Austin tear that dome down.
I thought they put the match together so well. These guys are truly 2 of the best on Earth. No doubt. I swear to you, when Taker missed the suicide dive, I thought he was legit knocked out and I thought Shawn would win via countout. They got me. What a fucking tease that Mark Callaway is. Throughout the rest of the match I was on the edge of my seat. I remember looking up around the stadium. I just wanted to take in what I was apart of; Truly one of the most epic matches ever, imo. I seriously felt like this was one of the greatest moments IN MY LIFE. Man, I take wrestling too seriously. None the less, this match had me jumping up and down in the aisles…literally. When Shawn started stomping his foot to “tune up the band” I stomped along with him. I’m 25 years old and I was stomping on the ground to the beat of a balding man child (™Andy). I just didn’t give a fuck about looking cool in front of the people in the crowd. I just let myself go. I’d like to say I embarrassed my friends…but they were doing the exact…same…thing. This is all real, btw. Take the rest of the actual match into account, and you have more than enough to justify 5 asterisks. I swear to God I’m not trying to rub in the fact that I was there and you guys weren’t, but if you were there, you’d know what I’m saying.
This is all on one watch, though. Who knows, I could fall out of love with it. Probably will. But for now I’ll stand proud with ***** next to the match. I can already see this called the most OVERRATED MATCH IN EVERZ~.
Cena vs. Edge vs. Show - ***1/4
Oh hey guys, good luck following THAT. I’d say hundreds left after Taker/HBK was over, but the place was still pretty full. Anyway, really good match here, which is what you expect from the WWE main event style triple threat. Glad Cena won. There were so many smarks in my are who jeered his very existence, my friends included. I can say that I totally embarrassed them when he won and I acted like a fucking dork for the guy. Good times.
HOF stuff was cool. When Austin left about 5 seconds after he was announced, everyone in my are both laughed and booed. When he came out he got their hearts right back. Generic Beer party thing he does but I loved it.
Orton vs. HHH – N/R
OK, reason it’s N/R is because I wasn’t giving my utmost attention to the match. There were unsupervised kids sitting in front of us all night who were jumping up and down on seats and stuff, and in this match it really annoyed me. They were losing their shit, it didn’t help they had like 23 funnel cakes throughout the night. They might as well have snorted an eight ball in the bathroom. Plus, my friends were pretty burnt out and I was just chatting with them through some parts of the match. Add to that the camera men were being douches by taking the boom cam all around the arena. This led to everyone’s interest going to the camera, as opposed to, you know, the match. Plus the crowd was pretty dead after HBK/Taker anyway. That clearly should have main evented. The crowd was trying so hard to get into this but they just fell flat. Finish didn’t help things. I drove home hoping that maybe it came across better on TV. I mean, I didn’t like last year’s main event as much as most, so maybe this is the same. Apparently not, judging by these ratings. I’ll take a peak at it fairly soon because I want to have an honest opinion, but if you forced me to put a rating next to it with doubt in my mind about the match (What are you? A MONSTER?!) I’d probably say about **3/4 or so. However you look at it, I’m sure it’s a match that no one will ever say anything positive of for years to come.
EDIT: On a rewatch, I'll probably go **1/2. There was a good match in there somewhere, but it got lost in the fucked up structure of the match, which was a little off as well. Both guys hitting their finishers in the first 2 minutes didn't help things as it really took the crowd out of it, who had witnessed 2 spotfests, Steamboat owning Father Time, Taker/Shawn, Cena winning the title, and Steve Austin's possible last appearance already and were pretty dead. There's a reason they're called finishers, you should build up to them and not use them as momentum shifters so soon. Probably could have shaved off 6 or 7 minutes as well. The finish was also pretty embarrassing but coming from HHH, you just grow to expect it. Again, the match was solid but unspectacular. Certainly not what a Wrestlemania main event should resemble. Quite the sour taste in your mouth.
Overall, I had the time of my life, and quite frankly I’m a selfish person and I’m all I care about.
Really fun match. Great way to kick off the show. I was surprised to see it on the preshow, but whatever. If you’ve seen one of their matches, you’ve seen this one. Still really good for time given.
MITB - ****
I could go ***3/4 but my blind markiness for Punk pushes this into that territory. Really enjoyed it as the rating shows. Kofi is a freak. He really stood out in the match. There was also a part of me, albeit small, that thought maybe Orton wins the title and HHH kills him. Then Punk cashes in and poetically gets revenge on Orton for taking his title in September. I know, I know.
Apparently, I’m the only one who didn’t mind Kid Rock. I mean I had that damn CD with these songs 10 years ago, so maybe that’s why. Way too long though.
Divas - N/R
Too much shit going on for me to care. I looked in the ring from my seats and saw a sea of blonde hair, so it was tough to pick them apart. Santino was pretty over. I don’t rate battle royales.
Jericho vs. Legends - **1/2
Holy mother. Blew me away. Give Steamboat a contract now. Glad Jericho went over. Speaking of over, Flair very much is. I heard ‘woo’ing all day and he got a great pop when his face showed on screen or when he was in the match.
Matt vs. Jeff - ***1/4
Pretty much what I expected. Fun hardcore garbage match. Loved the finish too, just a sick TOF.
Rey vs. JBL – ¼*
Um, yeah. Thanks for the memories, John. Entertaining segment.
Michaels vs. Taker - *****
All right. First off, I’m pleased to see ratings like this from a ton of people for the match. When it was over and the first “rating” to pass through my mind (I swear it didn't cross my mind until after the 3 way was over. I was like, “Oh yeah, STARZ~! What was I thinking? This is clearly the most important thing about wrestling. I should probably get on that if I want some sweet IWC credibility.”) was *****, I figured I’d have to explain myself. Looks like I’m not alone, but I’ll go ahead and try to anyway even though I’m dead tired as I type this. I remember people saying that everyone was rating this match ***** before it even happened like Flair/Michaels last year. I’m sure in some instances it’s true, but not on my end. I’m a low expectation kind of person. I keep them there and I’m rarely let down (especially when it comes to wrestling, where even if I’m let down by something, I can turn around and find another match or whatever to pick me up).
Anyways, I’m gonna go ahead and cheat with my rating and use an old fashioned cop out. My reasoning? You just…had..to be there. OK, judging by all the five stars I see coming from posters I see that isn’t necessarily true. The whole fucking feel of this moment (not match…moment. From the screenshot that flashed on the big screen before the match took place, to the pop THAT got, to Shawn’s (I’m sure super cheesy to some but not to me) grand entrance to clearly the match itself, everything about this screamed perfect to me. I’ve had a feeling very close to this before, at Mania X-7 when I saw Rock and Austin tear that dome down.
I thought they put the match together so well. These guys are truly 2 of the best on Earth. No doubt. I swear to you, when Taker missed the suicide dive, I thought he was legit knocked out and I thought Shawn would win via countout. They got me. What a fucking tease that Mark Callaway is. Throughout the rest of the match I was on the edge of my seat. I remember looking up around the stadium. I just wanted to take in what I was apart of; Truly one of the most epic matches ever, imo. I seriously felt like this was one of the greatest moments IN MY LIFE. Man, I take wrestling too seriously. None the less, this match had me jumping up and down in the aisles…literally. When Shawn started stomping his foot to “tune up the band” I stomped along with him. I’m 25 years old and I was stomping on the ground to the beat of a balding man child (™Andy). I just didn’t give a fuck about looking cool in front of the people in the crowd. I just let myself go. I’d like to say I embarrassed my friends…but they were doing the exact…same…thing. This is all real, btw. Take the rest of the actual match into account, and you have more than enough to justify 5 asterisks. I swear to God I’m not trying to rub in the fact that I was there and you guys weren’t, but if you were there, you’d know what I’m saying.
This is all on one watch, though. Who knows, I could fall out of love with it. Probably will. But for now I’ll stand proud with ***** next to the match. I can already see this called the most OVERRATED MATCH IN EVERZ~.
Cena vs. Edge vs. Show - ***1/4
Oh hey guys, good luck following THAT. I’d say hundreds left after Taker/HBK was over, but the place was still pretty full. Anyway, really good match here, which is what you expect from the WWE main event style triple threat. Glad Cena won. There were so many smarks in my are who jeered his very existence, my friends included. I can say that I totally embarrassed them when he won and I acted like a fucking dork for the guy. Good times.
HOF stuff was cool. When Austin left about 5 seconds after he was announced, everyone in my are both laughed and booed. When he came out he got their hearts right back. Generic Beer party thing he does but I loved it.
Orton vs. HHH – N/R
OK, reason it’s N/R is because I wasn’t giving my utmost attention to the match. There were unsupervised kids sitting in front of us all night who were jumping up and down on seats and stuff, and in this match it really annoyed me. They were losing their shit, it didn’t help they had like 23 funnel cakes throughout the night. They might as well have snorted an eight ball in the bathroom. Plus, my friends were pretty burnt out and I was just chatting with them through some parts of the match. Add to that the camera men were being douches by taking the boom cam all around the arena. This led to everyone’s interest going to the camera, as opposed to, you know, the match. Plus the crowd was pretty dead after HBK/Taker anyway. That clearly should have main evented. The crowd was trying so hard to get into this but they just fell flat. Finish didn’t help things. I drove home hoping that maybe it came across better on TV. I mean, I didn’t like last year’s main event as much as most, so maybe this is the same. Apparently not, judging by these ratings. I’ll take a peak at it fairly soon because I want to have an honest opinion, but if you forced me to put a rating next to it with doubt in my mind about the match (What are you? A MONSTER?!) I’d probably say about **3/4 or so. However you look at it, I’m sure it’s a match that no one will ever say anything positive of for years to come.
EDIT: On a rewatch, I'll probably go **1/2. There was a good match in there somewhere, but it got lost in the fucked up structure of the match, which was a little off as well. Both guys hitting their finishers in the first 2 minutes didn't help things as it really took the crowd out of it, who had witnessed 2 spotfests, Steamboat owning Father Time, Taker/Shawn, Cena winning the title, and Steve Austin's possible last appearance already and were pretty dead. There's a reason they're called finishers, you should build up to them and not use them as momentum shifters so soon. Probably could have shaved off 6 or 7 minutes as well. The finish was also pretty embarrassing but coming from HHH, you just grow to expect it. Again, the match was solid but unspectacular. Certainly not what a Wrestlemania main event should resemble. Quite the sour taste in your mouth.
Overall, I had the time of my life, and quite frankly I’m a selfish person and I’m all I care about.
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